Funny Dog Quotes Free to Use

funny dog quotes

Funny canis familiaris quotes can cheer up the darkest days, or add together some unique sparkle to an occasion. Dogs are natural comedians, and our love for them comes wrapped in entertainment at their silly ways. They are impuissant, messy, snorting, drooling, playful balls of joy wrapped up in fur and wiggly butts. Today we'll share the most hilarious, unusual and amusing quotes for dog owners and dog lovers alike. From Turner and Hooch to Marley and Me, the big screen has come up with some unforgettable classics. And we've institute even more dandy television, book, mag and paper quotes that are sure to heighten a laugh. Whether you want a good quote for a hymeneals, something to say in a birthday card or congratulatory message, these funny dog quotes will get the chore washed.

Contents

  • All-time funny dog quotes
  • Curt funny dog quotes
  • Funny dog quotes from films
  • Funny dogs quotes in literature
  • Dog walking quotes
  • Funny domestic dog quotes for dog tags

Need a laugh? But watch your domestic dog for a few minutes. He is bound to do something that has yous slap-up up. This is why dogs make such bully therapists, best friends and companions. So, with that in heed, we've gone ahead and compiled a listing of hilariously appropriate funny canis familiaris quotes to make you grinning almost as much every bit your domestic dog makes you smiling. But before we brainstorm, let's talk well-nigh how tin we use these funny dog quotes.

All-time Funny Dog Quotes

The post-obit listing of funny dog quotes wins the category of the best in our opinion. Not simply are they hilarious; they are as well totally true. And it'due south not funny if it'due south not relatable, right?

  • "They never talk about themselves but listen to you while you lot talk almost yourself and keep up an appearance of beingness interested in the conversation." – Jerome K. Jerome (comedian)
  • "Scratch a dog and you'll find a permanent task." – Franklin P. Jones (comedian)
  • "A lot of shelter dogs are mutts similar me." – Barack Obama (former president of the United States)
  • "Don't accept your dog'due south admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful." – Ann Landers (columnist for the Chicago Dominicus-Times)
  • "Handle every stressful situation similar a dog. If you can't eat information technology or play with it, just pee on it and walk away." – Unknown
funny dog quotes

Short Funny Dog Quotes

Looking for funny dog quotes that are a bit shorter? If you lot are looking to post some funny dog quotes on your social media accounts, sometimes shorter is improve. Every concluding 1 of these funny dog quotes had us in stitches. Many of them were spoken by two-legged comedians.

  • "My domestic dog is half pitbull, one-half poodle. Not much of a watchdog, but a roughshod gossip." – Crag Shoemaker (comedian)
  • "Everyone who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a canis familiaris." – Franklin P. Jones (comedian)
  • "What practise dogs do on their day off? Can't prevarication effectually — that's their task." – George Carlin (comedian)
  • "If you're uncomfortable around my canis familiaris, I'm happy to lock you lot in the other room when y'all come over." – Unknown

Funny Dog Sayings from Films

Permit's face up it. A number of films well-nigh dogs wind up making the states both laugh and weep. The skilful news is that you've stumbled upon a listing of funny canis familiaris quotes, which means these quotes promise not to elicit tears. From 1989'south "Turner & Hooch" to the ever-famous "Marley & Me," we've got some pretty hilarious funny dog quotes from our favorite doggy movies.

  • "These are simple rules. No barking, no growling, you will not lift your leg to anything in this house. This is not your room. No slobbering, no chewing, you will habiliment a flea collar. This is not your room. No begging for food, no sniffing of crotches, and you will non drink from my toilet. This is non your room." – "Turner & Hooch" (1989)
  • "So, in all my lives equally a dog, hither's what I've learned. Have fun, obviously. Whenever possible, find someone to save and salvage them. Lick the ones you love." – "A Dog's Purpose" (2017)
  • "A dog has no utilize for fancy cars, big homes, or designer clothes. A water log stick will do merely fine." – "Marley & Me" (2008)

Funny Canis familiaris Quotes from Literature

Phone call me biased as a writer and author myself, simply I admire quotes from literature. And I especially admire quotes from literature that are funny and involve dogs. If y'all're anything like me, then you're welcome in accelerate for this astonishing listing of funny dog quotes from literature I've put together just for you (and for me).

  • "I sometimes expect into the face up of my dog Stan and see a wistful sadness and existential angst, when all he is actually doing is slowly scanning the ceiling for flies." – Merrill Markoe (author, "Nose Down")
  • "When an 85-pound mammal licks your tears away, then tries to sit on your lap, it's hard to experience sad." – Kristan Higgins (author, "In Your Dreams")
  • "I don't understand people who don't touch their pets. Their true cat or dog is chosen a pet for a reason." – Jarod Kintz (author, "This Book Is Not for Sale")
  • "As wonderful as dogs tin be, they are famous for missing the point." – Jean Ferris (author, "Once Upon a Marigold")

Best Funny Domestic dog Quotes in Novels

  • "I've seen a look in dogs' eyes, a rapidly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically, dogs think humans are nuts." – John Steinbeck (author, "The Grapes of Wrath")
  • "Owners of dogs will have noticed that, if yous provide them with food and water and shelter and amore, they will think y'all are a god. Whereas owners of cats are compelled to realize that, if y'all provide them with food and h2o and shelter and amore, they describe the determination that they are gods." – Christopher Hitchens (author, "The Portable Atheist")
  • "All his life he tried to exist a good person. Many times, withal, he failed. For, after all, he was but human. He wasn't a domestic dog." – Charles Thousand. Schulz (cartoonist, "Peanuts")

Funny Canis familiaris Walking Quotes and Dog Car Ride Quotes

I also come up beyond ii quotes that amused me regarding domestic dog walking and riding with dogs in cars.

  • "Did you ever observe that when yous blow in a dog's confront he gets mad at y'all? Only when you take him in a car, he sticks his caput out the window." – Steve Bluestone (co-founder of ICF Panels)

This next quote is not and then much funny every bit it is super sweet.

  • "Happiness is a long walk with a dog." – Unknown

Forth with the list of funny canis familiaris quotes from literature, this section regarding funny dog tag sayings is worth repeating to friends and family unit. No lie, I'm going out tomorrow to revamp my own canis familiaris'due south name tag with one of these clever, funny and fifty-fifty slightly inappropriate domestic dog tag sayings. Be forewarned. I changed some of the more than colorful words for the sake of our younger readers.

  • "Take your people phone call my people."
  • For the deafened dog, "I can't freaking hear yous!"
  • "Oh no, I'm lost! Please call my mom. She is ugly crying. Really ugly crying."
  • "I'g chipped. Get your people to phone call my people."
  • "I ESCAPED! Mwah-ha-haa!"
  • "Call my mom. She'southward lost without me."
  • "Free beer upon return."
  • "Call mom earlier she freaks out."

Cheeky Dog Tag Quotes

  • "I like smelling butts and I cannot prevarication."
  • "Not all who wander are lost…simply I am."
  • "If you can read this I will lick yous."
  • "Every twenty-four hour period is hump day."
  • "Breaking hearts and diggings farts."
  • "I'one thousand a jerk and ran abroad."

Is Your Canis familiaris a Funny Dog?

If you take got a funny dog on your hands—and let's face it, who doesn't—then chances are you loved this list. And if you are embarking on the journey of new pet-parenthood and fancy yourself a comedian of sorts, and so we've got some other list entirely devoted to hilariously funny dog names. Accept a look at our list of funny domestic dog names here.

The Labrador Handbook by Pippa Mattinson

Do yous know of any funny dog quotes that we may have been missed or left out of this list? Don't be shy. Tell u.s.a. some of your favorite funny dog quotes in the annotate section below.

The Labrador Site Founder

Pippa Mattinson is the best selling author of The Happy Puppy Handbook, the Labrador Handbook, Choosing The Perfect Puppy, and Total Recall.

She is also the founder of the Gundog Trust and the Dogsnet Online Grooming Plan

Pippa'due south online preparation courses were launched in 2019 and yous can find the latest grade dates on the Dogsnet website

calahanthrost.blogspot.com

Source: https://www.thelabradorsite.com/funny-dog-quotes/

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